Stef wrote back to me today. That was a big surprise. She wants to start things up again, and I think I want to to. I can't respond to her as her damn yahoo mailbox is full and I keep trying to send a short letter telling her to delete some stuff. I don't know how else to contact her as I don't know her online names now or her phone # to reach her at. It's frustrating.

I want to get messed up on tramadol and cry/feel about her, which I think I'm going to do. I loaded up on the antihistamines and loaded on the creatine so the opiates will have a bigger boost on me. I need more than 300 really but that's the most they will give me.

Ugh. Well time to go ask again.

Jade isn't on again. I called her cell phone and left a message real fast so hopefully she'll get it and she isn't doing anything tonight. I could use a friend to talk to. Maybe Tami will come on tonight. Or someone. Someone to talk to, anyone, someone that cares just a little.