I woke up this morning feeling very sad. I almost broke into tears. The medication switchover is starting to get to me I guess. Sigh. I don't want to be back to having crying spells every morning again. Friday night I could barely talk to Jen online and had to leave because I was getting upset for no reason, I don't know what is wrong with me. I'm going to load up on Ultram tonight and whatever else I can get my hands on, Klonopin and Xanax I guess and get as messed up as I can so I won't have sad feelings and won't have to think about things I don't want to think about. I cloud my mind with prescribed chemicals to make me fixed, and I cloud my mind with unprescribed chemicals to fix myself. What's the difference? They both are fucking me up, just some slower than others.