Missed posting for a day. Don't have much to say really. I miss talking to Raven, I wonder what she has been up to. Last night Tessa spent an hour or spilling out her heart to me, and I think today she'll just ignore me and stuff. That seems how a lot of people are. I'm great to talk to when they have problems that need fixing, but otherwise they would rather just be in their own world.
I felt pretty sick today. I almost puked for no reason at all that I can think of. It really sucked. I ended up not after a while of feeling that way.

Today is my day of doing ultram and getting really messed up. 250mg down, and possibly another 250mg in 30 more minutes if I feel like I need it. I have such a strong resistance and I'm only doing it once a week now. Sigh. My poor poor nose too. Snorted 2 xanax yesterday and it felt great. At least it didn't hurt terribly much. I hate my life and what I'm doing to it. I act all different around people, but they really don't know the kind of failure I am. Just look a little harder people, please. Tell me to fuck off or something.